Four years is quickly approaching for Jamie and I--in the marital sense.
And while I should be looking up what the socially acceptable "anniversary gift" should be--I scoff and pretend a list of such nature doesn't exist in our world. (No, I am not dogging on anyone or any couple who follows the traditional anniversary gifts).
I reflect on this because I had written Jamie a letter (yes, on Vday) that basically stated how grateful I am that our love has evolved---it has not remained stagnant. We have endured our rough waters, of course, but that comes with any relationship. What I am most grateful for is the fact that we came to this peacefulness where we just, "BE". Without sounding like a debbie downer----Jamie and I don't necessarily have the opportunities to go out for a dinner, take a trip or drop the boys off at one of our parents' house. (No, I am not complaining). What I am trying to say is how Jamie and I have learned that at this point in time we are focused on just getting 10 minutes with each other, let alone a moment to catch up on what is going on in our lives without already going crazy.
I have learned to value him more. To value our time. To recognize the moments he has with our sons when he is home----feeding Henry, playing with James, changing a massive blowout by Henry and trying to make it home to kiss James goodnight. Those things matter. I don't want the flowers. I don't want the traditional anniversary gift. I would love more time but I know that isn't in the cards for us at this particular point. So we carry on and we "be".
I think "being" for us means the absolute comfort in one another even when we aren't/can't give each other the time it deserves. I've said it time and time again but our "survival" mode the next three years is what will make us stronger. By "being" we understand and are more sensitive to what we are going through on a daily basis---even though he will never fully know what I deal with and I won't fully know what he goes through. However, the clarity and relief comes from knowing we are there for one another without having to explain much.
So this next month, as we celebrate our 4 year wedding anniversary, I plan on giving him a big "thank you" for handling all of this--with such grace and strength.
Cheers to you, Jamie.
I couldn't do any of this without you---
Beth
And while I should be looking up what the socially acceptable "anniversary gift" should be--I scoff and pretend a list of such nature doesn't exist in our world. (No, I am not dogging on anyone or any couple who follows the traditional anniversary gifts).
I reflect on this because I had written Jamie a letter (yes, on Vday) that basically stated how grateful I am that our love has evolved---it has not remained stagnant. We have endured our rough waters, of course, but that comes with any relationship. What I am most grateful for is the fact that we came to this peacefulness where we just, "BE". Without sounding like a debbie downer----Jamie and I don't necessarily have the opportunities to go out for a dinner, take a trip or drop the boys off at one of our parents' house. (No, I am not complaining). What I am trying to say is how Jamie and I have learned that at this point in time we are focused on just getting 10 minutes with each other, let alone a moment to catch up on what is going on in our lives without already going crazy.
I have learned to value him more. To value our time. To recognize the moments he has with our sons when he is home----feeding Henry, playing with James, changing a massive blowout by Henry and trying to make it home to kiss James goodnight. Those things matter. I don't want the flowers. I don't want the traditional anniversary gift. I would love more time but I know that isn't in the cards for us at this particular point. So we carry on and we "be".
I think "being" for us means the absolute comfort in one another even when we aren't/can't give each other the time it deserves. I've said it time and time again but our "survival" mode the next three years is what will make us stronger. By "being" we understand and are more sensitive to what we are going through on a daily basis---even though he will never fully know what I deal with and I won't fully know what he goes through. However, the clarity and relief comes from knowing we are there for one another without having to explain much.
So this next month, as we celebrate our 4 year wedding anniversary, I plan on giving him a big "thank you" for handling all of this--with such grace and strength.
Cheers to you, Jamie.
I couldn't do any of this without you---
Beth